Five Signs Your Hormones Have Gone Rogue
If you’re a woman in your 40s or 50s (perhaps even 30s) who no longer feels like yourself, you could very well be in perimenopause. Perimenopausal symptoms are odd, annoying, and surprising, and they all leave you asking, WTF? Read on for a handful of examples.
- Everything itches. Have you ever watched monkeys at a zoo? They swing from tree branches and pick bugs off their offspring, but they also spend ample time scratching themselves. This is you in perimenopause. You are a scratching monkey because everything suddenly itches—your skin, your scalp, your ears, and your nether regions.
- You’re super clumsy. I’ve always been a fan of pratfalls and physical comedy because nothing is funnier than when someone falls down in a ridiculous way. Now that I’m in the thick of perimenopause, however, I am a walking pratfall who sustains a new injury each time I round a corner, open a drawer, navigate stairs, or climb out of bed. Every activity is potentially perilous for a perimenopausal woman. If you notice middle-aged women who are cut, bruised, bandaged, or limping, show them some love because they are simply trying to make their way through life while in perimenopause.
- Yawning has become your most common form of expression. I remember being constantly fatigued during the first trimester of my pregnancies, and it makes perfect sense because growing a human is exhausting. I assumed that level of tiredness was behind me once I was past the childbearing years. Alas, perimenopause proved me wrong. If you are in your 40s or 50s and suddenly find yourself not just wanting but needing a mid-day nap in order to make it through the rest of the day, you may very well be in perimenopause. It’s kind of like on Thanksgiving Day after you’ve devoured a bunch of turkey and find yourself in a tryptophan coma only it’s every day that you can’t keep your eyes open.
- Things smell weird or off, even things that aren’t actually there. I’ve always had an odd sniffer, as in I can smell things from a mile away (okay, not really a mile, but you get my drift). In perimenopause, it’s as if that already heightened sense of smell is intensified even more, and it is not pleasant. Daily I wonder, “What is that smell? And where is it coming from? Is it me? Is it in the air? Is it inside my nose? Is it inside my head?” Phantom odors are another sign of perimenopause, as in smelling things that simply aren’t there. If you smell burning plastic, burning cigarettes, or burning wood, you’re not crazy; you’re in perimenopause.
- You feel down/moody/depressed/not yourself. One day a few years ago (prior to recognizing that I was in perimenopause), I thought, What is the point of life, anyway? Like, who cares about anything? We just get up, stumble through our day, drop into bed exhausted, then repeat it all the next day. And on and on and on. How fucking depressing. This Debbie Downer attitude was not my usual vibe, but my life just seemed so colorless, blah, and pointless. I chalked up my sour mood to being an overtaxed mother, wife, daughter, and human. But I came to find out that the shift was due to a drop in hormone levels.
Has perimenopause commandeered your body & your brain, wiped you of your energy & enthusiasm, wreaked havoc on your sleep & sex drive, and left you feeling like a shell of your former self? Are you feeling confused, stuck, isolated, unseen, misunderstood, exhausted, and ticked off? If so, Why Did I Walk into This Room? Finding the Humor When Perimenopause is Kicking Your Ass is for you. This relatable read not only shares helpful insights on how to find relief from perimenopausal symptoms but it also promises plenty of laughs along the way—all while reminding you that you are not alone during this precarious perimenopausal journey. You’ll laugh out loud as you read this collection of essays, all while saying, “Same, sister!”, “Amen, mama!”, and “OMG, yes!”
If you’re looking for hope, humor, and healing as you navigate perimenopause, Why Did I Walk into This Room? is just what the functional medicine doctor ordered. Pre-order your copy today: Why Did I Walk Into This Room? Finding the Humor When Perimenopause is Kicking Your Ass – Braughler Books Store